Olympic fever.

Last week, RegularDad and I were sitting in the living room, flicking through the channels, when we happened upon the Opening Ceremonies of the Olympics. Oooooh, let’s watch, I said. Which is weird, because I never get into the Olympics. Seriously. The last time I remember ever actually watching them is when Mary Lou Retton won all those perfect 10’s, way back when.

But, for some reason, this year, I’m hooked. I can’t stop watching the damned Olympics. And, if I may paraphrase what it says up in the banner up there, I don’t have time for this. The laundry is piling up, I haven’t exercised since the games started, I’m eating way too much junk food way too late at night, I’m missing out on some sorely-needed sleep, and it’s starting to show.

Two weeks ago, I had no idea who Michael Phelps was. Now, I hang on the edge of my sofa for every race. Two nights ago I stayed up past midnight watching the swimming races. I collapsed into bed at 1:00 am, and when RegularDad’s alarm woke me up a few hours later, the first thing I heard was the garbage truck rolling up the street:

“Oh no!” I said to him. “I forgot to put out the trash.”
“It’s okay. That’s not the trash truck,” he said. “That’s the recycling truck.”
“No,” I said. “Recycling only comes on Monday.”
He looked at me funny and said, “It IS Monday…. How late were you up last night?”

The next night, I stayed up until 1:00 in the morning to see the final outcome of men’s gymnastics. I mean, I could not go to bed until I saw if they got the medal. Seriously.

Last night, we tuned in for the women’s gymnastic finals. We ate cheesy puffs and drank grape juice in honor of all the calories they were burning on the screen. We noted the obvious young-ness of the Chinese team a half hour BEFORE the TV announcers made reference to it. I mean, two of them looked to be maybe twelve years old. Thirteen, tops. And we also noticed how the American girls looked so… TOUGH. Like some sort of modern West Side Story gang of girls. And we also noted the overall BLONDE-NESS of the group. Oh sure, they had a token brunette and a token redhead, but other than that, they were WAY BLONDE. I know it must have been the pressure they were under, but they just looked… MEAN. I’m sure in real life, they’re very nice young ladies.

A little after 11:00, RegularDad had to go to bed. He has to get up early in the mornings and go to work. Me, I’ve got to get up early because the kids get up early (My Kingdom For Children Who Sleep Later Than 6:00 AM!!!!!) but it’s not like I’ve got to operate heavy machinery or anything. So, I stayed up to watch the end. The next morning, when RegularDad’s alarm went off, I woke up with a headache that promised to linger all day long.

“So, how’d it end?” RegularDad asked me.
“We got the silver,” I said. “We could have got the gold but one of the girls fell off the balance beam, and it all went down hill from there.”
“Oh. Which one fell?”
“The blonde one.”
“Um, yeah. Which blonde one?”
“You know… that mean-looking one.”

He almost asked “WHICH mean-looking one?” but then must have realized how quickly we were succumbing to a horrible, exhausted, olympic rendition of “Who’s On First?” and he went down to the kitchen to pour some coffee without another word.

He’s a wise man.

I got the kids through their schoolwork and suffered through today’s headache until about an hour ago when I broke down and took two Advil with a cup of caffeinated coffee. I’ll pay for the coffee later on tonight. But at least I’ll be wide awake when Michael Phelps wins another one.

Go team.



8 Responses to “Olympic fever.”

  1. 1 Lizabeth August 13, 2008 at 5:30 pm

    Hilarious. I’m actually wishing we had TV in our house this summer, just for the Olympics… but I guess I’m better off getting my sleep. Do keep us posted on how it all turns out. Cuz you know I can’t find out anywhere else. 🙂

  2. 2 ami August 13, 2008 at 7:55 pm

    We’re watching, too. Fast forwarding through all the crap.
    Fast forwarding every time the smarmy, smirking face of Boob Costas shows up, too.

    What a tool.

    Our family has been having a great time watching together, though. We’ve spent more time talking and just hanging out than we usually do.

    We’re recording and watching last night’s events tonight, tonight’s events tomorrow etc. Oh, and avoiding the news reports.

    Working pretty well for us so far.

    And did I mention we don’t have to look at or listen to Boob Costas?

    (Your spell check thinks ‘Boob’ is just fine, but queries me on Costas.)

  3. 3 RegularMom August 13, 2008 at 9:53 pm

    Ami, LOL!

    If I wasn’t so tired from staying up late watching the Olympics, I’d figure out how to program my VCR (God, just saying that phrase really dates me, doesn’t it?) so I could tape the Olympics and watch them at a decent hour with my kids and then, YES, I could skip over that IDIOT. He really is a tool, isn’t he. 🙂

  4. 4 Not June Cleaver August 13, 2008 at 10:26 pm

    OMG! I just have to comment and say that I was having the exact same mean girl thoughts when I watched last night. What’s with that? When they smiled at each other, I kept thinking, “Oh maybe they aren’t mean afterall.”

    And the Chinese gymnasts were definitely not the minimum age of 16. How do they verify that anyway?

  5. 5 RegularMom August 13, 2008 at 11:24 pm

    Not June, Wow, we’re like on the SAME PAGE. That blonde who kept standing there with her eyes closed…. every time we’d see her doing that RegularDad would say: “Man, that one’s all like: DON’T TOUCH ME!”

    And I think I heard the announcers saying something about using passports to verify ages. And since the Chinese don’t need passports this time around…. well, I guess they’re kinda just sorta flubbing the ages a bit. But, maybe the announcers were just joking around.

  6. 6 Urban Mom August 13, 2008 at 11:28 pm

    Regular Mom, go check out Life With My 3 Boybarians if you get a minute. She did a great post on the Chinese gymnasts’ age thing and linked to an article about it too. You can link to her from my blogroll.

    This sounds just like our house too. I can’t stop watching the tube! I’ve started recording it and fast-forwarding through a lot of the commentary, plus the 500 hugs every gymnast has to give everyone after every exercise.

  7. 7 Not June Cleaver August 14, 2008 at 11:44 pm

    Maybe it has to do with focus. My youngest is a competitive gymnast and he is VERY SERIOUS at meets. People comment about it. His usual friendly persona disappears. One of the other dads came up to him after a meet last year and said, “Hey Theodore, I saw the pommel horse judge make you smile.”

    Now I’m off to find out more about the “boybarian” mom. As a mom of 3 boys, I adore the name of the blog.

  8. 8 yestheyareallmine August 15, 2008 at 1:20 am

    I am so sleep deprived from the absolute need to watch the Olympics that is it pitiful.
    Exhibit A: it is 1:20 am here on the East Coast and I am posting a comment because I HAD to watch Nastia take the gold and Shawn take the silver. You go girls!!!

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